How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
