Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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