I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
