Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
