No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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