Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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