My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
