The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
