We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
