It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
