cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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