Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
