"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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