So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i want to swaddle you in tequila
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
