i don't like sucking hair
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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