they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
