we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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