"it" just moved
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
