we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
