if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
