I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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