I don't think brook has ever known best
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
