dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I can't turn off my feet"
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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