I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He passed out mid-signature
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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