apparently the secret to your success is patron
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
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