dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
