I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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