hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
