You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
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