Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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