I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
