she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
