he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
