either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
