i may or may not be watching the land before time
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Randomize
