you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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