I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
