im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize
