Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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