We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
