I'm going to jail i love you
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
