you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Are my feet made of real feet?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
