I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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