Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
