his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
