omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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