Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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