we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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