Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
