I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I'm both gender and math confused
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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