Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
